I then dutifully waited to receive approval of the prescriptions so I could order the meds online – I’m not completely technology phobic - several days passed and nothing happened.  I called the online prescription fulfillment company, and after going through their multilayer IVR system finally got a live person on the phone, told, they had no confirmation from the doctor and I needed to call my physician to have him fill out the forms that where being faxed to the doctor’s office.

Hmmm, they have the forms and I need to call the doctor to tell them to fill them out, they have all the information including the doctor and know where to send the forms but I have to tell them to fill them out and fax them back.   I’m wondering to myself – what’s wrong with this picture?  I called, and when I did get a live person.  I told them I followed the automated instructions for prescription refills, and for some reason, it didn’t get to the prescription refill company.  The person on the line informed me that everything looked correct, didn’t understand what could have gone wrong, and said she would have someone call me.  Later in the day, I received a call and told that my request for my refills was entered into the system, but something happened on their end and it went into “cyber space.”  In other words, not our fault, it was the computer system.

I got my refills, but I still don’t know if the connection between the online prescription fulfillment company was corrected, I’m not up to doing another 15 rounds with their IVR system.

That same day, I placed a call to Plantronics®.  I was having trouble with my wireless phone headset.  For no reason, I started to get a loud buzzing in the headset – and no it wasn’t from the prescription drugs – something was wrong with my headset.  I call the customer service number for Plantronics® and to my surprise after two rings; a real person answered the phone.  I told her my problem and expected to be told to call another number, image my surprise when she said, “I can help you with that, we just have to reboot your headset and I’m happy to show you how.”  She then took me step by step through the process and I no longer have a buzzing sound in my headset.

Two examples of accountability, in the first example, no accountability at all, and the second accountability abounded.  Let me explain.

In my first example, when I called the fulfillment company, the person I spoke to, didn’t take solving the problem to a reasonable conclusion.  He, through the ball back in my court instructing me to call the doctor to have them him fill out forms that he would fax over.   My guess is his “protocols” required him to tell the patient – me – they need to make the call to the doctor, whom I don’t fully understand, because they have all the information on record and could have handled it much better. There solution to solving this problem was actually no solution.  Second, at the doctor’s office, their solution to solving the problem was to blame the computer for lost electronic paper work.  Third, and most important, I still don’t know if the required paperwork went to where it’s supposed to, because no one said they would get back to me to let me know.  I’m guessing that I have to make a follow up call.

With Plantronics®, we have an outstanding example of accountability.  The individual I worked with took it upon herself to help me with my problem.  She was knowledgeable, and walked me through everything I had to do.  She also had all the information on my purchased.  When the problem was corrected, she then told me that since I bought my system in 2005 I was at the life expectancy of my battery and that if I was getting any static in the headset, it’s a good indicator that it t may be time to replace the battery.  I have to tell you if she asked for the order, I would have said yes for no other reason, than being so pleased with the level of support and the fact she took it ownership of the problem, solved it, and didn’t put it back on me, the customer to find a solution.

Now, that’s customer service the ACTing R.I.G.H.T™ way.

Consider the following, you son or daughter come in and tell you that they want to drop out of school because they feel their teachers don’t understand them.  What is your first reaction?  I think most of us would move in the direction of telling them about the benefits of staying in school.  That without and education their chances of getting a good job are limited at best.  Some of you would even say, “Over my dead body” with a strong dose of how you sacrificed for them and that doing such a thing is being selfish and ungrateful.

What happens?  Your child leaves frustrated and despondent, feeling guilty of bringing the subject up.  If that was you goal, congratulations you achieved it.  But, if your goal was to find out what was troubling them, you missed it entirely.  You only heard the first part of the statement, the part that caused you to react and go into super parent mode.  The part you needed to hear was the latter, the part that they don’t think their teachers understand them.

The art of listening wasn’t in play for you.   The art of short cutting via stereo-typing was in play.  When faced with this type of situation we use our knowledge of what a life is like without a decent education.  Many of us have friends or relatives who thought they could make it without the benefit of a decent education, and immediately we go into hyper mode to prevent our children from going down that path.  It’s only natural.

Everyone has the desire to protect love ones from making the type of decisions we believe can be harmful.  However, the objective is to listen I mean really listen.  Doing this is the most effective way we can provide help to our family members.  In our short scenario, the real issue is the child feels that their teachers don’t understand them.  By waiting, we get a fuller picture of what may be the real problem.  Consider the following:

“I want to drop out of school, my teachers don’t understand me.”

“Wow, that’s different from yesterday.  Yesterday, you were excited about getting to class to present your project.  What happened?”

“It’s Mr. Dell, I did everything he told us to do and had all the points in my presentation.  It was right out of the book.  It was everything he said we should do.  And he told me I wasn’t being creative, I wasn’t thinking for myself that I needed to put my own thoughts into it not just repeat what the book said.  I followed the instructions, and gave him what was in the book and he still didn’t like it. He doesn’t understand me.”

By really listening, you start to get to what may be the real problem.  I’m being deliberate, in my statement “you start to,” for this reason, sometimes it takes asking a series of questions before we get to the real problem along with really listening, we must also be patient.  People will eventually tell you what is bothering them.

As parents, we can easily fall into the parent trap of knowing what’s best for our children, and be quick to dispense advice with anecdotes that underlie and support the advice we are giving.  After all we’ve seen it all, been through it and understand the consequences of making bad choices.   We are just trying to prevent what may have happen to us or friends and family members of ours, from happening to our children.

As coaches and consultants we have a wealth of experience and knowledge and like the example above, we can short-cut our listening to our clients, because we’ve heard it before and we’re quick to offer a process or solution that’s worked for us in the past.  But when we do this, we are setting ourselves up as vendors not advisors.

We owe it to our clients to make sure that we are really listening to them.  If we take the time to slow the process down and really listen to what they are saying, we will be in a better position to help the with their problem thus providing true value to our clients making us advisors as oppose to vendors.

I could only imagine that the driver was very cold because he/she had both windows down and the temperature was in the low 20’s.   Only a person who loves dogs would be so accommodating to their pet.  But, there was something about seeing that dog, with his head out looking sticking its head into the breeze and just enjoying the moment.  That’s when it hit me.  This dog didn’t care about anything else, it was just enjoying that moment that point in time.

With the daily pressures each and every one of us face, how often do we take the time to stop and just enjoy a moment in time, letting a figurative cool breeze pass over our face.

You gotta love a dog.

Two minutes later, a young lady who seemed to be the manager came out, took the chair in front of him, and proceeded to conduct an interview with this person within earshot of everyone in the restaurant. Now you have to understand, I’m sitting right behind him and can hear everything. I must admit I found this a bit befuddling. I looked at my receipt to see if I was charged for this because I certainly didn’t order it or see it on the menu.

After leaving for another appointment, I then recalled a similar instance; I witnessed in another restaurant; the manager was conducting a performance review for one of their employees, again with customers sitting around able to hear everything that he and the employee had to say. All I can say is I’m glad that person wasn’t our waiter, because the review wasn’t going all that well.

I started thinking about this looking for a common theme and came up with the following, these took place in chain restaurants.  The other common theme was I was uncomfortable witnessing both of these instances. I wondered why this was happening in such an open area, where customers could hear every question – in the case of the interview – and every this is what you need to improve on statement– in the case of the performance review.

This got me to wondering, is this becoming a common practice or is this just unique to chain restaurants. If this is or has become a common practice then I’m beginning to understand why service people are becoming less and less helpful, and customer service is going in the drink.  Think about it for a moment, if you just received your review in front of customers, would you be a happy camper?  Would you want to be the best waiter/waitress or would just rather drop a pot of hot coffee on the next customer that came into the restaurant.

When I go to lunch or dinner at a restaurant and review the menu to make my lunch or dinner selection, I don’t ask for a side order employee performance review or potential wait staff interviews with my order. So why do managers insist on doing this? To do this is being disrespectful. It’s disrespectful to customers, they come to have lunch or dinner, not hear an interview or performance review.

But most of all it shows a profound lack of respect for the employee or potential employee.  How can you expect anyone to work hard for you if you review him or her in front of customers?  What are you saying to potential employees when you conduct their job interview in a setting where everyone can hear the entire conversation?

I’m still wondering when interviews and performance reviews became part of the menu.  I would be interested in hearing your thoughts on this.

This past Saturday the New England Patriots completed their regular season with a 16-0 record. It’s quite an accomplishment as I’ve noted in an earlier post. What I didn’t write is what would have normally happen during the game and after the game. Under normal circumstances, I would have received a call from my son, who would have been totally excited about what was happening. He would have been text messaging me with a follow-up phone call to discuss the game. I would have heard the excitement in his voice as he would exclaim with confidence, we’re going to the “Super Bowl Baby.” In between the discussion about the game, I would have asked him, about the baby and his wife.

I didn’t get a call, and I know how the wife and baby are doing, because they are here living with my wife and me. Our son, our beloved son is no longer with us due to the car accident that took his life in September.

As 2007 comes to a close, my thoughts for all of you are simply this; fathers, call your sons, or daughters and tell them that you love them. Sons and daughters call your parents and let them know that you love them and care about them.

All you fathers, who may be reading this and think it’s not macho to do what I’m suggesting, keep this in mind; if you have the terrible misfortune to lose the most precious gift you will ever get, you will cry like a baby, no matter how macho you consider yourself. To come to grips with the fact that you’ll never get another phone call from your child is a feeling you don’t ever want to have. Trust me. What you want hear is “I called because I just wanted to talk to my dad.” I know I’d give everything just to hear my son’s voice again.

Please be safe tonight and may 2008 bring you joy and happiness.

Happy New Year